"Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place."
-- Unknown
--

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Dyslexia of the mouth and other charming traits

This week's writing assignment from Mama Kat: In what ways are you turning into your mother?

Oh. Dear. Lord. To say that Mama and I had a rocky relationship for the majority of my adolescence would be putting it mildly. We screamed, argued, slammed doors and called names. I was sassy, hard-headed, trying and disrespectful. Plus, she was "like, totally overreacting" about everything, right? I didn't understand why she'd get so mad at me for leaving towels on the floor. Or for letting my laundry pile up for a week before taking it all down to the laundry room. Or why it was such a big deal to leave a glass sitting on the table for hours after I was done with it. I mean, she would eventually pick it up anyway. No biggie.

Had you told me that one day I would be just like her, I probably would've rolled my eyes and said, "Uh, whatever." (I was a charming teenager.) Little did I know...

The first time I heard her words fall from my lips, I nearly passed out. I FINALLY got it. I was living with a slob of a roommate and it was wearing on my patience. It seemed like every time I cleaned the house, she'd come through and mess it up. I'd wash dishes, and she'd leave five dirty ones on the counter with food stuck on them. We had a dishwasher. What was the problem?! She'd leave clean dishes in the dishwasher for DAYS if I didn't unload them. It was driving me mad. One day I snapped. I said, "Do you think that this thing just unloads itself?! NO. I do it! Every time!" Then I froze in terror and had a small panic attack when I realized that, not only did I speak my mother's words, but they came out in the exact same tone of voice that she always used when she was frustrated with me. Whoa! When did that happen?

Since then (after five years of various roommates with various degrees of nastiness), I've really come to understand her years of frustration with me. It's exhausting to spend so much time and energy cleaning, then have someone come through and mess it all up in a matter of minutes.

And it's not just the cleaning thing. Oh, no. Our similarities run much deeper. For instance, I also inherited her totally inappropriate sense of humor, which leaves me giggling uncontrollably when I see someone fall down. And her dyslexia of the mouth that makes me say things like "trow slucks" when I really mean "slow trucks." Oh, or what about the ability to invent all new words, like "expressionful," when I really mean "expressive." Yep. I got that too. The goods just keep coming.

But you know what? I've come to realize that being like Mama isn't such a bad thing. In fact, I'd be pretty proud if someone compared me to her. Know why? Because, despite all of our past bickering, I've discovered that Mama is a pretty cool person. She's strong and funny and completely unafraid to say what she thinks. She stands up for what she thinks is right and does things her own way. And she's not afraid to laugh at herself. I like that.

So all in all, I might be turning into my mom in some ways - but that's okay. Things could be worse. I could still be a moody teenager who rolls her eyes and says, "Whatever."

12 comments:

Diane said...

Awwwww... I hope one day Ryan writes a post like this about me ('cause you know she's totally gonna blog).

And now I really DO want Mama to adopt me. And since I haven't been an obnoxious teenager for a looooooooooooooong time, she'll love me best ;)

SweetPeaSurry said...

Oh dear darlin, don't ya know the new word today is 'Whatevs'? Kids these days can't even be bothered to say the WHOLE FREAKIN WORD! LOL

blessings sweetie!

Lacey said...

I totally know what you mean about that *first instant* when you realize you're using your mom's tone of voice! It happened to me a few years ago with the vacuum cleaner... and suddenly I realized why my mom was such a jerk about not letting me comb my hair outside of the bathroom. Smart ladies, our moms!

You know what's scary though? How much ELSE do they know that we don't? I mean, we don't even have kids yet! Which means we're totally screwed in the knowledge department. Like, totally. I'm going to throw and extra "like" in there for good measure. Like, seriously.

America's Next Top Mommy said...

I get more and more like my mother everyday! Yikes! It seems like the older I get, the wiser I think my mom was!

Anonymous said...

Thanks - You made me laugh and cry at the same time.
Now will you share some of you new wisdom with your youngest brother
since he doesn't seem to understand the big deal about the piles of laundry on the floor in his room or the towels all over the bathroom floor, or the dishes on the sink instead of the dishwasher...HERE WE GO AGAIN

And yes Diane, I will adopt you, would love to have Ryan as a granddaughter, as Toby is my only grandchild right now.

M

Miss Angie said...

Hi! I found your blog through Mama Kat's workshop.

Did you know there's an actual word for when you accidentally switch the letters or syllables in words like "tow slucks" as you mentioned above? I just read this a couple of days ago and thought it was kind of fun.

It's called a "spoonerism" because of William Archibald Spooner who was famous for making these slips of the toungue!

Also, I can totally relate to suddenly realizing you sounded just like your mom! :)

Very well written!

Andy - Instafather said...

So funny- I can just imagine you having one of those light bulbs, Eureka moments when you said that Mom quote.

Missy said...

I wish I could turn into my mother! She is so patient and kind! I am so hurried and hateful! She just has a magic about her that makes everything ok. I wish to be that for my son!

Jaime said...

yeah... i just about died the first time i heard one of my parents come out of my mouth. at about 10 different times today i quoted my dad.

Anonymous said...

Hi- just stopping by to say hi. I am a first time participant. Check out my non profit website
www.parenthoodforme.org
We need help spreading the word

Jenners said...

Totally loved this! And I just can't imagine you as an obnoxious teenager. I just can't!!!

And the other day, the Little One said "polly lop" instead of "lollipop" and we both laughed and laughed.

Jennifer-Eighty MPH Mom said...

I totally know the feeling! I find myself saying "my mom things" all the time with my own kids. Her words make so much more sense to me now that I'm an adult!

Please check out my Writers Workshop if you have the chance:
http://eightymphmom.blogspot.com/2009/04/writers-workshop-moment-when-i-was.html