Nothing stays the same

Weekly writing assignment from Mama Kat: What happened in the last year? Write about something you can do now that you couldn't do a year ago.

This past year has definitely been an eventful one. I can honestly say that almost every aspect of my life is different today than it was last March.

I’ve completed an internship, graduated, taken my first “real-world” job, moved, lost friends, lost a mentor, lost a boyfriend and struggled to find myself in the midst of all of the change.

Last March was my last semester of class in Troy. I was frustrated with school and terrified that I’d never find the internship I needed to graduate. I worked a crappy part-time job (with full-time hours) at a clothing store – letting myself constantly be pushed around by my idiot boss. I had no time to do anything but go to class and work. Finally, when I realized I’d never graduate if I didn’t get busy and line up an internship, I quit the crappy job. Thanks to a tip from a fellow journalism student, a wonderful reference from my beloved advisor and some form of divine intervention, I wound up snagging an internship with the company that I now work for full-time.
When I got here, I instantly fell in love with the people and the town (small as it may be.) I felt like I was home. I didn’t want to leave, and began dreading the whole job-search ordeal that would have to take place before the end of summer. Thankfully, a few weeks before I graduated, my boss offered me a job. I interned up to the day before my graduation, and started full-time the day after. It was seamless.

When I came here, a lot of things changed very quickly. I went from living with two other girls and both of their dogs, to living in a house with just me and Toby – from paying a third of the bills, to paying all of them on my own. From living in a town where I knew everyone, to living in a town where I knew virtually no one. From seeing my boyfriend every day, to seeing him once a week or less. I had to learn to adjust. I had to learn how to be on my own in every sense.

And you know what? It’s hard. I’ve struggled with a lot of emotions over the past several months. I’m doing fine, but it definitely hasn’t been a cake walk. The last month or so has been the hardest – dealing with the pain of realizing a relationship that I had been in for several years might not be the best thing for me. The hardest part is knowing I’ve hurt someone I care about.

But I can honestly say that I’m stronger, wiser and more independent today than I was this time last year. I know that I can count on myself to get by. I think that’s probably my biggest accomplishment to date – feeling secure in my ability to provide for myself.

I can’t wait to look back this time next year and see what’s changed.